I've Moved

Here's a note to let you all know that I've moved.

You can find me now at Dancing Willow.

Please update your links!

Oh, and to let you know, I got the internship at Copper Canyon Press. I start January 4th!

I'm Here

It is raining, the mist is rising off the bay and floating around the trees on the next island over, I had good chai this morning and picked up a few more boxes, I'm finishing one application for an internship and will finish one for a web magazine tonight, I'm so happy, I'm going to do some laundry, when I remember I will upload some photos, this really isn't as slow as I thought it might be, and I am so happy I could cry.

I moved to Washington after becoming a college graduate.

Wow.

Gone ...

I will be back sometime soon.

Just probably not right away.

I have lots to do when I get to Washington.

In only about 12 hours.

I'll be back.

I promise.

I Woke Up This Morning

And there was Grandmothir Moon, shining in my window, telling me that everything will be okay.

This is it. This is the last day.

Here I go ...

More Images

So, tomorrow is going to be a hellishly busy day, with two final exams, many errands to run, lunch plans and dinner to eat, people to see, and not enough hours in a day to it all.

Today I am focused on finalizing all of tomorrow's plans and preparing my things to travel to their respective new homes. And I'm focused on school, on finishing my paper and studying for my two exams.

Rather than blogging something sentimental about leaving the place I have called home for fifteen years and about leaving all the people that I know to go and live in a place I have only been to once and don't know many people in and is totally different from everything I know, I'm going to post some pictures and go back to my currently scheduled programming, which is all about school and planning.



The view from my window in my new room, as taken by my Dragan.

**And yes, Alex, I know Blogger has spell-check. It's that way for a reason.**

Sunset from West Windows *Damn Blogger! Sorry!*

This is the sunset on December 16 from the windows on the west side of the house. I would guess this is taken through the Dragan's bedroom window, looking out over Scow Bay and Indian Island to the Olympic Mountains.

Perhaps I will have a picture of my room to share later. We'll see!

If only I could be certain I would get everything done ...

**UPDATE: Here's the picture of my window & windowsill and my room. Hooray!

Sunrises

So, when the sun rose this morning in Minnesota, it was cloudy and snowing. I didn't see it rise, though I felt it in my bones.

My Dragan, though, spent part of hir morning driving about catching the sunrise in Washington for me. Here are some of hir snapshots:

The sunrise over the land bridge to the Island. That's Mount Rainier in the distance.

The sunrise at East Beach, a favorite romping ground. This is the east side of the Island.

Only five more days ...

**Sorry about the embedded links. Blogger won't update to put the little pictures in there.

Remember the Spinners?

I didn't really talk about them, but when I went to the conference in Mankato, there were these two womyn spinning. One had a staff and one had these great things that looked like long socks with tennis balls in them.

I have seen staff spinning before, and have always loved it, but knew I could never do it because a staff does not bend a flow with movement. A staff is rigid, solid, straight. Not for me.

But these other things, I liked them. They flowed and wiggled and waved and were really entrancing to watch. I didn't get a chance to ask what they were, but I knew I wanted to learn.

I hadn't thought much about them until recently.

Last night I dream-remembered that drum circle and the spinners. I paid really close attention to the womyn with the sock-things. I watched hir body. Shi moved with them much the same as I move when I dance with a ball of energy.

I woke up wanting to learn.

Just a bit ago, my Dragon asked me to google "poi". I found the Home of Poi, and what do you know?

"Poi" is the name of those sock-things the womyn at Mankato was spinning.

I thought I was going to stop breathing for a moment.

It was pretty wild.

So now I want these sock poi and these beginner poi so I can out onto the beach and spin poi while my Dragon spins fire.

Now I'm going to go home and finish writing my paper.

Darkness

The sun sets at 4.38pm here today.

The darkness crawls into my bones, my skin, my spirit.

I want to hibernate, to sleep, to eat tubers and warm bread and climb into the arms of my lover and hold hir and just exist in the same space.

I can't wait to be sitting together in a chair and know that neither of us has any where else to be.

Shi wants me to knit for hir.

I think I found a keeper ...

This is officially my last week as a college student. I think I'm panicking just a little. I don't know anything other than being a student in an academic system.

Life, here I come. Let me learn from you.

How Many Boxes

How many boxes would it take to ship all of your possessions across four states (effectively half the country geographically) by Postal Service?

That is the question I have pondering as of late, as each day I pack a little, purge a lot, and ship more boxes to my home in Washington. It is certainly a process, a learning experience, and an opportunity for growth.

Now, if only writing a paper about Helene cixous was this easy ...

Just so you Know

Tuesday night blogger ate my long and photo-filled post.

Wednesday morning my internet stopped working.

Wednesday afternoon I learned that a potentially harmful program was loaded onto my computer at some point and the only way to clear it is by reformatting my laptop and re-installing Windows.

Wednesday night I wiped my laptop clean and re-formatted.

It still isn't working because there is a code issue.

Thursday morning I called and begged to have internet reconnected so that I could register my copy of Windows with Microsoft so they don't think I pirated it.

That was too much cajoling for my taste.

Now, my internet is "supposedly" reconnected but I have to work for the next two hours and can't go home to fix it, plus I have to go out to my parents' house and find the rest of my things that must be sorted and try to spend as little time there as possible.

And I want to finish fixing my computer.

But I'm supposed to be writing three papers. And studying for three exams. And packing all of my possessions.

I just want to be in Washington.

You know that feeling, when you just want to be somewhere else because you are so ready for the next step that you can't even honor the place you are in right now?

That is where I am.

I don't know when I will blog next. Perhaps tomorrow morning. Perhaps some other time. Perhaps when I get my computer fixed.

Perhaps when I get to Washington.

Well, no. Probably before then, as I still have 12 days to finish in Minnesota.

For now, I am just trying to breathe.

Oh, and here's my new song:

All I want for x-mas is a Typepad account,
a Typepad account,
yes a Typepad account.
Gee, I'd like for x-mas just a Typepad account,
'Cause then dear blogger couldn't crash on me!

Off to do more work. Wish me luck!

Just a Teaser

Because I was a bit busy packing to blog last night.

Good Food

I forgot to blog last night. I was more worried about planning and packing than blogging. Sorry.

Right now I am eating a piccolo roll with butter and garlic lightly toasted. I'm rocking out to Heart. I am drinking good water, though not as good as my Washington water.

Today I did my Grad plans, so I can officially graduate in December. Well, I sort-of forgot about them until I made my list of things to do before the semester ends. But now they are finished and awaiting signatures. I also wrote one of my three papers, and made arrangements to take my last final early.

So it is official.

I am moving to Washington on the 20th of December.

That's in 16 days.

I have a lot to get done by then.

Tomorrow I start packing books. And DVDs. And CDs. And maybe some other things that I do not need to have with me right now.

And I write my Lit Crit paper that is due on Tuesday. Maybe I should pick a topic before I go to bed tonight, so that I have some direction come morning.

I have a scarf to knit for my sistir, and I am still working on Clapotis. I am supposed to knit a pair of mittens, so I will write out the pattern for them and then hopefully get them knit before I leave. The worst part of having a stash of yarn is moving it half-way across the country.

I am moving half-way across the country in less than a month.

Sometimes I realize the huge-ness of what I am doing. Sometimes I get really scared and I call Mad Hatter and we talk and shi tells me about how shi has been moving things out of the one bedroom so that I have a space and we talk about bookshelves and dressers and desks and chairs and closet space and I feel much better about the whole thing because it is more real that way. And then I remember all the things I have to do before moving and I panic just a little and then I remember that calm I felt in Washington at the Ocean and I think I can do this.

Then when shi says to me "Can you be here now?" I get teary and wish that I could teleport and successfully reassemble my molecules and the molecules of my things and be in Washington right now.

That would sure save on shipping costs.

* * * * * *

On Thursday, Mad Hatter and I stayed in bed until almost 10am. We lounged around the house and got up slowly. We put on romping clothes and took the dogs to Fort Flagler, where we were greeted by 5 bald eagles on our hike through the woods, along the beach, and along the shoreline at the top of the bluff. It was so great. We decided to take our time and not worry about catching the early ferry across the Sound to meet Mad Hatter's son and father for Thanksgiving dinner. When we got home we called and told them we would be a little late; hir son didn't seem to mind.

We changed clothes (I wore a slinky black dress with slits on both sides and my six-inch heels because they were the only dress-y shoes I brought with me) and got in the car to head for the ferry. It rained the entire drive. We had to wait in line, but thankfully made it on the next ferry. Because ferries don't wait. We actually made it to dinner at Arnie's in Edmonds before they did and had a wonderful, albeit slightly awkward, dinner.

We dropped hir son off at a friend's house and then made our way onto the ferry and back to the Island, where we slutty danced in the bedroom and went to bed early. We really didn't spend much time at the house. We were constantly going places and doing things. It was nice, if not busy.

On Friday, we also slept in. We had to make the Ferry to Seattle to be in Bellevue by 1pm, but we didn't make it. In fact, we were the third car from the front of the ferry line. So we called Gypsy Jill, and when we got there we walked to the Whole Foods and got soup and bread and cheese for lunch.

Jill painted on the rough outline with a paintbrush weighted with a feather and tattoo ink. Shi later told me that it is a "race against the clock." The trick is to do as much work as you can (and the person can handle) before the ink starts to dry and fade. Shi says that it the gauge of how much you can do in one sitting.

Mad Hatter did the entire outline. 1.5 hours of black line work while laying on hir stomach, Jill on one side and me on the other. It was pretty amazing to watch and in which to participate.

After we left Gypsy Jill's, we walked back to Whole Foods and bought a pineapple and some coffee. Mad Hatter was in really good shape, and decided that shi needed to take me somewhere in downtown Seattle.

As we were driving down the main street in this particular section of town, I noticed the Seattle Art Museum, a beautiful building that peaked my curiousity, being a lover of museums. I noticed they were showing a Louis Comfort Tiffany exhibit, and mentioned how great it would be to see. We drove to a parking ramp and got out.

Indeed, it was the SAM that Mad Hatter wanted to take me to see, though not for the Tiffany exhibit. However, shi was very kind and let us wander through. I think shi actually did enjoy some of the work. But it was the Native Art exhibit that shi wanted to show me. It was truly breathtaking and memory-evoking. A very unique experience. I can't even really put it into words.

After we left the museum, we wandered around near the Pike Place Market, which was mostly closed. We just walked and held onto each other and talked and laughed and kissed in the streets and just existed together. It was really wonderful.

But, of course, I got really hungry and realized that my blood sugar was probably pretty low. I wanted a grilled ham and cheese sandwich and, oddly enough, so did Mad Hatter. So we found this fifties diner called Johnny Rocket's, and luckily they had grilled ham and cheese sandwiches. We each got one, and we shared a plate of fries and onion rings and a chocolate malt. It was really good. And there was this really sweet young gay man who was our server, and he kept smiling knowingly at us lesbians at his table.

After dinner we walked back to the car, first stopping and the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory for a peanut caramel apple and some chocolate-dipped cherries (for me!). We went back to the car and drove down to catch the ferry to Bainbridge Island before driving home. It was late, nearly 11pm when we got back, and we had plans to leave and be gone the next day, so we went to bed early (once again).

Tomorrow, the ocean, the peninsula, the rain, the snow, and the cedar trees. I might even have pictures by then.

For now, peace and love and warmth to everyone. I'm up here in the frozen tundra where it is negative 3 degrees with a windchill of negative 18 degrees.

Can I be in Washington yet? It is much warmer there.

***UPDATE***
Here is a photo of my Mad Hatter as Nordland's own Lesbian Santa:


And I realized that my original intention for this post (as illustrated by my title) never made it's way into the post. Oh well.

Filing Away

When I feel like I don't have control over some aspect of my life, I file and organize things so that I feel like I have some control.

Tonight I filed and organized receipts from the last five months and then transferred and re-organized and re-filed all of my important documents (insurances, taxes, school financial aid, etc) from a file folder to a file box (it's an upgrade). It isn't that I don't have much control in my life; quite the contrary, I have much control over the choices I am making in my life right now. I am choosing to move to Washington, I am choosing to graduate in December instead of May, I am choosing to downsize my belongings and evaluate what is really important in my life, and I am choosing to take care of myself.

Right now I am choosing to eat vanilla yogurt with golden flax seeds and strawberry-raspberry granola from a rice bowl with a spoon that I'm not sure where I got while rocking out to a mixed CD of Heart songs that my Dragon sent me. Because I can. Later I will choose to knit some on Clapotis, or not, because I have that choice. This afternoon I took a nap because I was tired and cranky and because I have the luxury of being able to nap in the afternoons, as much as I dislike it because I have FOMS (Fear of Missing Something) syndrome. I am very grateful for the ability to choose the things I do in this life.

The Dragon is a painting that my Mad Hatter did several years ago and has at hir house. It is very big (almost 13 feet long?!), and it is the design of hir tattoo, which shi is doing in very nice installments. When we met shi had only this face completed. While I was in Washington (Day 5), shi had the entire body outline completed. The womyn doing the work is named Gypsy Jill, and I think that shi will do my next tattoo. Shi totally gets the spirituality in the work, and I really liked hir energy.

Today I am supposed to talk about Day Three of my trip to Washington. I still don't have the photos, but I will talk a little. I spent Wednesday morning and early afternoon wandering around downtown Port Townsend, looking in shops and meeting people. I got my sistir some very beautiful origami paper from a paper/stationary shop, and I found the jeweler-friend of Mad Hatter, Haden Starbuck. Shi has some really wonderful work, and if you are looking for hand-crafted jewelry gifts, I totally recommend hir. I saw much of this work in the gallery, and I wanted it. A lot.

Mad Hatter and I went to lunch at a little bistro called Bread & Roses, off the main street in Port Townsend. I had a great spinach and cheese frittata, and shi had a grilled veggie panini. Very delicious.

After lunch, Mad Hatter decided to do some investigating. You see, Washington voters recently passed Initiative 901, which makes it illegal to smoke in any public place and within 25 feet of any public doorway, window, or air intake. This effectively makes Washington a smoke-free state. Mad Hatter, being an officer of public health, decided to go looking for public ashtrays. Because 25 feet is really in the center of the street from any public building. SO public ashtrays will need to be removed. We went in search of these public ashtrays in downtown Port Townsend while being gay together. It was really quite fun.

Wednesday afternoon shi left work early (being the day before Thanksgiving and all *grins*), and we stopped and picked up take-and-bake pizza and Shrek before heading home. We wandered around the house some, then got dressed to go romping down at East Beach. We took the dogs and off we went. It was a really great time. I fell in love with the beach. I showed hir my true appearance at the beach, ancient leathery skin and all. I think it freaked hir out a little. But shi was okay.

When we got back from the beach, shi gave me a massage. When shi was done, I fell asleep. Shi downloaded pictures from hir camera and made pizza while I slept. When it was done is about the time I woke back up, and so shi fed me pizza in bed. We didn't watch Shrek that night. After we ate pizza, it was about 11pm, so we just crawled into bed and snuggled before falling asleep.

It is 7 degrees Fahrenheit here in the tundra of northern Minnesota with no wind (it is calm) and humidity of 69 percent. I am calm also, sitting at my computer and feeling I have accomplished something this evening. I didn't get any writing done today, but I am going to write the three remaining papers for my semester this weekend as well as finishing up the other things I need to do in order to graduate in December, while also bringing snacks to church on Sunday and going to the spinners and weavers guild meeting tomorrow afternoon. It'll be a busy weekend, but if I get this done now then I have the rest of the semester to sort and pack and ship and move myself to Washington. I think it is an excellent idea.

Off to go talk to my Dragon and perhaps knit some.

December 1

December 1 is when my strongest desire to hibernate kicks into high gear. I just want to curl into warm arms in a warm bed and eat warm foods and drink warm liquids and be warm. And snuggly.

I was all prepared to tell you about my second day in Washington, but I realized that not much happened. Shi had a dentist appointment in the morning so I walked around a bit. Then shi had a work meeting so I got lost in a dense primary forest of cedar trees until I got chilled and then I went back to the car and started writing and five minutes later shi appeared. We went back to hir office and I met the very cool co-worker who is really pretty fabulous. Then it was time for us to go to lunch, so we went to the asian noodle place and had lunch (mmmmm curry chicken soba noodle soup). Mad Hatter and I wandered around downtown Port Townsend being gay together. Shi went back to work and I copyedited a report shi has been working on for a while and a send-out draft is due tomorrow. When shi finished work we went back to the house. We sat around and talked. We went to bed.

Not much happened the first two days I was in Washington. Shi had to work so that limited our opportunities.

Today I was slightly more present than yesterday, though not much. I knit two repeats of the increase rows of Clapotis throughout the day. I am tired today and I look it. My new sweater that my Grandmothir got me yesterday (early X-mas gift) sheds really terribly and so that might be a problem. My Washington water is almost gone. I had creamy potato soup for dinner but it wasn't homemade and it wasn't very good.

Does anyone know a really good or really controversial short story by Joyce Carol Oates on which I could do a feminist critique? I am really struggling to pick a topic for this silly lit crit paper.

May tomorrow be a more rested and more knitting sort of day.